My Only Regret

by Leslie Shalduha

In a life of almost no regrets

One stands strong in my heart

When we left him

No

When I left him

Taking her with me

I emptied her bedroom

Packed up her childhood

When she soon returned

To spend time as he was a dad to her

Of course

And took her bags upstairs

The empty room echoed

Memories of that meaningful life

A bedside lamp on a scrounged table

Offered a flicker of comfort

A mattress of air

Offered an illusion of steadiness

Literally

What the fuck was I thinking

How did I not leave that space

Filled with her sweet spirit

With her paintings on the wall

And fairies in the corners

I imagine him wandering the empty rooms

Feeling bereft, lost and alone

My rage blinded me from this kindness

And it is almost certainly

My only regret